journal entry 2.1.07

Yesterday I hung out at my brother's Starbucks, waiting for a friend to call about an apartment. Here's what came to mind as I journaled:

Last night I was so tired-- so,so tired. I felt overwhelmed with everything. I was mad & sad, but mostly tired. I feel like I have been tired since I've been back- for the last 2 months- feeling disconnected, like I'm just floating with no purpose. My analytical mind wants to pick this apart and make sense of it all. One option could be that I, after a year of working extremely hard for a cause with a huge amount of purpose, am feeling a huge let down. Now that I think of it, that is probably exactly it. As I was coming home [from Africa] I thought a job at Starbucks was exactly what I needed- that was my way of letting down, finding a no brainer job & "relaxing". Aside from the point that a job at Sbucks will not pay the bills for me, between student loans, a car payment & insurance, I think that doing anything now that isn't remotely like what I did in Kenya will not be satisfying. I have affirmed (once again) my passion [and my calling] for serving others- so deep that I have to do it. No questions about it!

Now that I've established that, I just wish I could handle the transitions between my "serving" a little bit better. I do suppose, though, that this specific transition, by nature is destined to be more difficult. Too many differences to describe (between Africa & here) and even if I attempted, who could understand?

I believe the greatest gift of my faith so far has been that even in times like this, when everything feels unstable, even spiritually, I know that Jesus is still my rock- He is still here, in spite of me. And that is the most stability a girl could ask for! <3 ~A

PS- Update! I found a great apartment in Oregon City today, thanks to my great friends, Ryan & Meridith (Lundy) Foley! And I also had two very good job interviews- one w/the Boy's & Girl's Club, and one with an insurance brokerage. I'm awaiting more news from them in the coming days. Yeah! Thanks for your prayers!! :)

reverse culture shock has set in...

This is the wierdest time in my life, with such a wide range of emotions. I am tired, sad, & overwhelmed. I feel lost-- like I have no idea where I'm going or what I'm doing. I feel clumsy & akward just about every moment of every day; like I am completely out of place. Here's the thing: in Africa, being white made me stick out like a sore thumb. I was stared at and thought of as out of place no matter what I did, or where I went. At first that was difficult to get used to, but after a while it became quite comfortable. I was able to drop all of those inhibitions and social awareness/insecurities and become comfortable with who I was, because I knew that no matter how hard I tried I would still be considered a WIERD-O! That was such a freeing way to live.

Now that I am back in American culture, however, it is amazing how quickly those social inhibitions & awarenesses creep back into my everyday life. Basically, I just don't feel like I fit in here anymore. I think this is a common feeling when one goes through reverse culture shock. And I don't expect too many people reading this to understand, unless they have gone through a similar experience.

There are so many other factors in reverse culture shock. For example, in Africa logical thinking rarely made its way into everyday life. That was also really hard to adjust to at first, but became quite comfortable after a while. Decision making rarely made sense, so nobody really cared if I totally messed up. Like I said, I stuck out anyway. In fact, I think they expected us to mess up on a regular basis. I still held myself to a high standard as usual, but the grace of the African culture was refreshing.

As I drive on the strictly organized American streets, sip my gourmet coffees, try on Levi's and new shoes, and preapre for the most anticipated holiday of the American culture, inside I am struggling to maintain my composure. Tears come to my eyes while walking down the grocery store aisle and watching tv commercials. I am not sure what to do with myself! And this, I suppose is what everyone warned me about.

Please pray for me, as I look for a job, try to find an apartment, and try to reconcile my cultural experiences thus far in life. In case you are wondering, I do hope to return to the mission field someday. Right now, I feel like I am where God wants me, but I have no idea why or what for. Thank you for all of your support. I am blessed by all of you!

Love & Blessings,
alita

I miss my flip flops...

I really do. My feet were not made for shoes!

I miss not worrying if I had enough layers on to stay warm enough throughout the day.

I miss "young missionary worship night" at our house.

The other day I was washing Thanksgiving dishes, and I remembered Boaz, the guy we had hired to help us keep house. He was so amazing, sweet & a Godly man. I didn't mind doing the dishes. But doing them made me think of him, and I missed him.

I miss the beautiful sunny mornings, and doing yoga in my room after I woke up.

I miss the kids very much...

______________________________________________


I love the brown, yellow & red leaves.

I love building a big fire and keeping it going all day.

I love anticipating the snow fall here in Prineville and hearing about it piling up on the mountain.

I love Starbucks (here in Prineville!).

I love my huge Christian family here in the Northwest.

I love spending time with my mom. Shopping, making dinner, watching movies, and deep conversations about life.

Kenya and the States are so different. But parts of my heart can be found in both countries. Right now I am back in the place where I am from, wondering where God is taking me next. I have a feeling it's going to be a long wait. Probably the longest one yet. But I'm ok with that. I really am. ;-)

Right now, this is all I've got... :)

Home Sweet Home

Well, being home has been good… but definitely different! It seriously feels like I have traveled through a time tunnel when I leave Africa and come back to America. If I didn’t know any better, I’d wonder where the cows, sheep, goats and chicken are that wonder the city streets and country roads in Africa. I would be amazed at the enormous automobiles these people drive around—and how everyone seems to have at least two of them!! But I would find absolute beauty—much like that of Africa, right here in my “new” backyard. This thing called snow—though treacherous is absolutely breath taking at times. And the food! Wow, the food! There is so much variety in content and flavor and style; it’s almost overwhelming. To think that anyone could ever go hungry in America blows my mind; I don’t think I’ve been hungry since I stepped off the plane!

I have had the awesome opportunity to talk to several people since I’ve been back and I have quite a few more chances coming up (including talking to two high school health classes about HIV/AIDS this afternoon!), but what I have told people is that you really can’t compare Kenya (or Uganda) to America. They are two totally different worlds. Each has their good and their bad; that’s life! And while my heart is happy to be back home with family and friends in my comfort zone; my heart still thinks about and misses those kids and people in Kenya very, very much. I haven’t really experienced the reverse culture shock I’ve been warned about yet; but here are some things I’ve noticed—

The first one may gross some of you out, but welcome to the mission field! We would have to conserve water on our compound because some times our house tank wouldn’t refill itself from the municipal line every day. In order to save a lot of our water we adopted the slogan, “if its yellow, let it mellow; if it’s brown, flush it down!” from several other missionary families we met. (Yes, we did have flushing toilets!!!) Now that I’m back in the States, and although I don’t have to worry about checking to see if there’s enough water in the big tank outside, I still don’t see the point in flushing the toilet if I only go #1! C’mon people! We should all be doing our part to conserve water no matter where we live! I’ve considered starting a national campaign… ;-) The other day I used the last egg and I found myself staring at the empty egg carton as I held it over the garbage can. “Should I really throw it away? You can totally re-use these things!!!” At the small market where we did most of our shopping, Soy Supermarket in downtown Kitale, we would transfer our eggs from the flat to the carton, take them home and then take our carton collection back every few weeks for Mahendra (our grocer) to re-use. I was forced to throw it away—who’s going to use it?! But now I want to find a grocery market where I can re-use my egg cartons! (Prineville doesn’t have recycling, by the way, if that’s what you’re thinking.) But my last story is the real duzy! I was driving up to the drive through window at Starbucks the other morning. I was coming up to the drive-thru drive way from the parking lot side. When I was almost to the entrance, a car turned into the parking lot from a street entrance right in front of me. I kind of hesitated, but decided I had right of way, since I was entering from the parking lot, where the line would have already formed (there are no lines at the Starbucks in Prineville… it’s beautiful!) After I turned into the drive-thru, I looked in my rearview mirror and the passenger of the car I apparently cut off was flipping me off as they drove past the driveway!! Not only that, but she was at least 60 years old!!! I was so flabbergasted I just had to laugh. How utterly ridiculous! I thought about going through the drive way, parking and going and finding them and saying, “I’m sorry I cut you off out there, but thank you for handling it with so much maturity!” With a big smile on my face and warmth in my voice, of course. But I didn’t. When I came around the side of the building, they were parked in a handy-capped spot right there, and the infamous passenger was talking on her cell phone. Oh man, I thought to myself… only in America!!! :-)

So coming back to America, life goes on. My world view has definitely changed. My heart has changed. This country has changed, and Kenya has changed. God is in the business of change! I would like to continue posting more on here as I debrief, so please stay posted. I am thinking about starting another blog now that I’m back. But would anybody read it? Let me know! :-)

Love & Blessings,
Alita

Official new parents, sorting rice: Nancy & Bosco Mukholi, Peter & Judith Simotwo

Greg & Sheri, Bosco & Nancy's 3rd daughter.

Alita @ 2 months.

To Everything There is a Season...

[Hopefully most people who read my blog will have already heard this news, so it will not come as a shock. If you haven’t heard this, I apologize that this is the way you have found out. Please feel free to email me with any questions you may have.]

It didn’t take us long after being here to realize that a majority of our time here in Africa was going to be spent at the Kenya Church of Christ Children’s Home. Before we arrived, we had no idea what shape the home was in, and how many improvements it needed to be run the way it should have been. But we quickly realized this and re-adjusted our priorities around the home, thus putting aside our goals and dreams of teaching AIDS education, counseling, and opening an AIDS clinic. While we definitely didn’t get to focus on AIDS ministry, we did get a first hand look at what it takes to run a ministry here in Africa, more specifically Kenya. We learned much about the politics involved, the accountability needed, the hardship of finding trustworthy people to help run ministries, but most of all about the inadequacy of our preparation in coming to Kenya. While God gave us what we needed to help the children’s home, we learned that it would take much more preparation and planning to start something like an AIDS clinic, or even that type of ministry. Working with a ministry that had already been around for 14 years taught us how much more it would take to start a ministry from the ground up.

Our sending church still had a vision for the AIDS clinic, however. And we felt as if they were expecting major results by the time we were scheduled to come home, next September, 2007. But the more we prayed about it and thought about it, the more we felt like the team that was needed was different than what we had to offer. We also felt like all the details that needed to go into planning something like that were far too many for us to start such a project, already almost one year into our two year commitment. For example, we really felt like the AIDS project is more needed in Kisumu, rather than Kitale. To do this, we would almost have to start all over again, with only 1 year left to achieve anything. After much prayer and consideration, we felt it wise that we return to the states now and help the church prepare a better equipped team to take on such a task. This was a very difficult decision to make, as we have already built great relationships with the church members here in Kitale, especially those at the Children’s Home. We felt like this decision was integral to the future of the AIDS ministry here in Kenya, however. We especially did not want to be bad stewards of the money that had been given in good faith that an AIDS clinic would be built in Kenya, when we didn’t feel like that was a realistic goal for us to achieve in a year’s time. (Things here in Kenya take about 10 times longer than they do at home, especially when you’re white!!)

We know that not everyone has understood or will understand our decision, but we feel at peace with this decision, and that it is what God had planned for us to do. Sometimes God uses one motivation to get you somewhere where your purpose ends up being completely different. Although we didn’t know about the serious problems at the Children’s Home, God used us to restore the home in many ways because we were willing to be used by Him. And we are so grateful that He chose to use us in this way.

In fact, I am still praying about returning to Kenya someday, maybe in the near future, or maybe further down the road. I don’t have any idea what that would look like, but I also can’t help but feel that God is not done with me in Africa. I am praying, watching & waiting for the time being. I appreciate your prayers regarding this as well!

Like I said, feel free to email me with any questions…
alita.tombleson@gmail.com

Blessings,
Alita

PS- We will arrive back in the states the night of October 30th in Seattle. I look forward to seeing many people over the holidays!

Rachel in Africa!

Whew! As soon as I got back into Kenya I went on a whirlwind trip with my friend, Rachel Schulte, from Seattle. Rachel’s a nurse who is interested in working here in Kenya, so she came back with me to check out Kenya. She also brought over extensive materials for first aid kids for our two projects in Kisumu as well as the children’s home here in Kitale. So we took off to Kisumu after only being back in Kitale for a few days. We spent a week down there doing medical treatment for the kids at Lakeside Children’s Home and the most severe cases at Ring Road Orphan Day School. We saw 60 kids in two days at Ring Road, a feat that Rachel said was impressive even back home. I took the kids’ history & general info so that Rachel could just focus on the medical problems. We also spent quality time with Thomas and his wife Irene, as well as Schola Odhiambo (Jared’s wife) and towards the end of our visit got to meet up with James & Lauryn. Jared had not yet returned from his visit to the states. We thoroughly enjoyed traditional African meals at Thomas and Jared’s house. And Rachel was happy because we pretty much found Coke Light (diet Coke) just about everywhere we went, which is the only soda that she will drink.

After we returned from Kisumu we spent a few days here in Kitale at the Children’s Home. Rachel did first aid training for the staff at the home, which included taking all of their blood pressures. The staff each received a writing pen from Rachel when they “completed the course” for which they were very grateful. Rachel left a large tub of medical supplies, including blood pressure cuffs, stethoscopes, pain killers, ring worm treatments, bandages, and a copy of the book “Where There is No Doctor”. Which is basically a great resource for first aid for people here in Africa.

After we finished up in Kitale, Carrie & I decided to take advantage of having a guest with us to go to the coast of Kenya. We started out our journey on a bus to Nairobi. This was not the bus company that we usually take to Nairobi, and we quickly learned why. About half way through the journey we experienced a Kenyan drug bust on our bus!! So we got on another bus because they wanted to take the driver and conductor of the bus in for statements at the police station. When we finally made it to Nairobi, we caught a taxi to the train station, where we waiting for several hours. Our train was supposed to leave at 7 pm, but didn’t end up leaving until almost 10! When we finally got off and rolling, we enjoyed some Kenyan cuisine in the train’s dining car and then headed off to our cabin to spend the night on the train. I’d never slept on a train before, but it was a pretty nice experience! We woke up the next morning a couple hours outside of Mombasa, the main coastal city in Kenya. Once we were there, we toured Fort Jesus, which was built by the Portuguese at the end of the 1500’s. The next day we woke up and boarded a matatu (a Toyota 14 passenger van, the common Kenyan taxi) for Malindi, about 2 hours north of Mombasa. We enjoyed finally getting to see the beautiful Indian Ocean and finding an unexpected Italian café where we could get real cappuccinos for only one dollar! The next day we boarded another matatu and went to Watamu, about half an hour south of Malindi. It was in Watamu that we found our favorite destination of the trip. Watamu is just a small beach side village, but it has beautiful beaches and our hotel was absolutely beautiful! We hung out on the beach, watched the stars at night, and I even got to catch a sunrise over the Indian Ocean… despite the African beach bums who tried to harass us into buying their wood carvings or necklaces, be their girlfriends or get our hair braided, we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves! The real adventure began though, when we tried to leave Watamu the next day to get back to Mombassa and catch our train back to Nairobi. We thought since it only took 2 hours to get to Malindi, it would take even less time to get back, since we had already driven south a bit more. But alas, we were wrong. About 3 ½ hours after we left Watamu we finally ended up in Mombasa, and we had missed our train by 15 minutes. (We figured they must not leave on time ever, since our other train left 3 hours late before! Silly us…) But our adventure did not end there! Our taxi driver thought he could get us to the first or second train stop outside of Mombasa. So we took off “speeding” (not really, but he tried) down the horrible road between Mombasa and Nairobi. As we pulled up to the first stop, the train was just leaving. On our way to the second stop, we got a flat tire! So we turned around and headed back to Mombasa for the night. We only had about 2 days before Rachel’s plane left, so we decided it would be more efficient to shell out the $120 to fly from Mombasa to Nairobi the next day, so Rachel would had adequate time to get the gifts she wanted to take back, and to spare ourselves from the 10 hour bus ride from Mombasa to Nairobi! It was totally worth it!! So we spent Rachel’s last day and a half craft shopping and hanging out at the Java House.

It was great to have Rachel here in Kenya. She definitely got a full perspective of the country, the people and the ministry opportunities here. And she was a great trooper throughout everything we did and everywhere we went. I think she will definitely fit well in Kenya, should the Lord decide to bring her here some day.

More later!
Alita

PS- I had this blog ready to be posted over a week ago! We've been having major telephone line/internet problems... I'll try to catch up over the next week from the internet cafe, which is proving to be far more trustworthy at this point! [smile]

Back Safely!

Hi Everybody!

Just thought I'd let ya know that Rachel Schulte and I made our 2 day trek back to Kitale safe & soundly. We flew out of Portland, Oregon at 8 am Tuesday, to Chicago, to Brussels, to Nairobi. We took a taxi from the airport to a hotel in downtown Nairobi to get a little rest before our trip to Kitale the next day. On Thursday morning (Wednesday night, your time) we took a taxi to the bus station and we were able to get tickets to Kitale that morning (I was a little nervous we wouldn't be able to, but we got some of the last seats available!) After almost 9 hours, we arrived in Kitale! Greg picked us up at the bus station, and it was good to be "home". A lot has happened since I've been gone... so I've got a lot of catching up to do. Kelly is in Mombassa (on the coast of Kenya) right now helping with a building project for another missionary. Greg & Carrie are doing well & healthy. Rachel and I are out in town today and we will begin outlining her trip here today and tomorrow to make sure we can get all of our goals achieved for her visit. I have a lot more to write about, but will save it for the next few days. Just wanted to put wondering minds at rest! :)

Much Love & Blessings,
Alita

PS- It was SO GREAT to see those of you who I got to see over the last 3 weeks. You are still just as much of a blessing to me as you've ever been--I miss you already!!

USA

HI!!!

Sorry... I've been in the states now for a week and a half and I've been crazy busy visiting with friends and family, going to church & wedding, etc. Here's a pic of the night I flew into PDX. My whole family was there to greet me (surprising, since my dad was working) and as you can tell, I became a little fountain of water works as soon as I rounded the corner and saw their faces. As you can also tell, it was a long 48 hours of traveling from Kitale to Portland!

It has been great to be home in Oregon so far. My family and my church family have been so great to visit with. The support and their love is almost overwhelming and definitely a HUGE blessing!!!

Much Love & Blessings,
Alita

PS- I miss my kids at the home!

The Downs...

It's hard to know how much I can write on here... I know many of my friends would say, "just write everything! I want to hear about the reality of your experience!" That's a nice thought... but I have realized lately the "reality" of life in Africa is so far removed from the reality of American life. For me to write about reality means that a lot of you might think that I have completely gone off my rocker!!! You might think that I have become cynical or an angry, bitter person. I'm really haven't but it may seem that way because it is very difficult for the American mind to wrap itself around a culture that is so unfamiliar to our own. Please don't think that I am insulting Americans... I'm not. I AM one of those Americans who has had a hard time wrapping her mind around this foreign culture for the last ten months!

That said, let me tell you about what we've been involved with the last 2 weeks. One of our goals upon arriving here was to get more kids sponsored for Christian Relief Fund. That task was a lot harder than it sounds. You can probably imagine the millions of orphans you here about lined up along the streets, totally innocent and in dire need of assistance. It's not that easy. We decided to emmulate a program that the Mbale team is using to find AIDS orphans in their area to be sponsored by CRF. It involves an application, reference letters from a pastor and the area chief, death certificates, and a home visit. Many orphans stay with grandparents or aunts & uncles. We have also taken into consideration single parent families, with the mother still alive. (The woman's place in society is so low it makes it difficult to provide for her family.) So, we made our applications, talked with our church evangelists (overseers/leaders for the churches), and started the process back in April. We took in several applications, weeded through them until we found the ones who seemed to be in the most need, and scheduled home visits.

Last Wednesday we started conducting the visits. Carrie & I went out with one of the evangelists each day from Wednesday through Saturday. We found ourselves in several different homes where we were very welcomed each time with some sort of food. We asked several questions and took pictures of each family. The home visits are important to clear up any confusion on the application, and to validify the orphan's situation. Africans are not ashamed to ask for anything (very unlike our culture), and will not stop short of telling a few lies to get something for themselves (very like our culture!). Because practically everyone here is in need, we really have to be careful about who we help. We have to retrain our minds to African standards instead of American standards. For instance, there is a difference between a nice mud hut and a not nice mud hut. Does this mud hut have a lot of well built furniture in it? Or merely a mat on the floor? At the same time, we are looking to see that the children actually live with the people who are claiming to take care of them. Where does the child sleep? Where does she go to school? These are things we've been looking at and asking about for the last two weeks. We felt last week was very successful. We didn't feel bad about any of the people we visited. They all seemed to be very honest and very much in need.

This week, however, has been a different experience. First of all, we had a pastor in one of the areas who thoroughly confused his church members as well as us about when the visits were taking place. He also had several church members who had already disqualified and had received letters of rejection. They were not happy with him or with us, so the first thing we did on Wednesday morning was have a meeting at his church with several of his members. The rest of that day was very difficult as most of our scheduled visits were told that we were not coming to visit them that day. (This was done in Swahili, and not translated to us.) We only ended up visiting one mama that day. And I ended up chewing out the pastor on the side of the road on our way back to car. I was angry, and I didn't feel well anyway, but that's no excuse. My behavior was embarrassing to me, but also to him. It was a major cultural faux pas. The next morning I apologized for my very un-Christlike behavior. I told him he was forgiven for his misgivings, and asked for forgiveness. I'm not sure I've been forgiven. He was pretty much done with us and our CRF program, but he did agree to show us where his church members lived so we could conduct the interviews. In each of the four interviews we conducted yesterday, we found at least one lie, which was very disheartening. The children are innocent, and families are in need, but if they can't tell the truth about what school their child goes to, how can we trust them with the money we would give them for school fees? This work can be a deep conundrum of dissappointing reality.

I guess I wanted to share this story with you because of the reality found in it. Living here is hard. I won't deny that. There are those great days when you get to dance because of the rain, and then there are those days that you find yourself chewing out a pastor on the roadside... I hope I have not ruined my credibility with you. My heart just longs to share this reality and be understood... I'm not sure if the understanding is entirely possible, but I can hope for it! I continually thank our God for his grace and mercy, and for His unending understanding of us. The more of life I experience, the more grateful I am to have such an incredible God!!!

Love,
Alita

Kanisa (Church)

Yesterday Greg & I went out to a village with Timothy Wamalya, one of our church evangelists for church. They were having a cluster meeting, which means that several church from around the area were all coming together to worship as one big group. The service got started around 11 am, and concluded around 3 pm. We had sheep, rice, potatoes and beans for lunch, followed by Kenyan chai. While we were eating lunch, a large storm started outside, dumping massive amounts of rain. It hadn't rained for a couple weeks, and people were starting to get concerned about their maize crops going bad. The rain usually stops after 10 or 15 minutes, but yesterday it just kept coming and coming. Timothy told me that when it rains when visitors have come, it means that the visitors are a blessing. Before we knew it, all the mamas in the church were up dancing and singing along to the keyboard that had brought in special for church that day. One of them grabbed me and I was in the middle of it all within seconds. It was so much fun! We all had cups of chai sloshing about as we stepped back and forth to the music. The joy was so evident on all of their faces. Thank you, God for the rain. Thank you, God for joy in the midst of struggling!

Alita

A couple months after we had been working here, we noticed that one of our workers at the children's home was starting to show a pregnant belly! I started asking her about it, despite our complete language barrier, and without realization that here in Africa you don't talk about the unborn, because of how high the miscariage & infant mortality rates are. Jane took it well, though. She smiled and laughed every time I asked about her baby. By the time I moved in to the home, she was almost at 9 months, and it showed! The other women at the home and I started calling her "Mama Kitumbo", which means Mama Big Stomach! She thought that was hilarious, especially when I said it, because of the language barrier and all. In May, we let Jane stay home for her maternity leave, and we couldn't wait for her seventh child to be born! On June 1, while we were Nairobi, Jane gave birth to a little girl. When we arrived home, we were told the news, AND that she had named her baby Alita, in honor of me. This last Saturday we finally had a free afternoon, so Carrie & I drove out to Jane's village with her husband David, a local pastor. David is typically an outgoing, smiley, good-natured sort of guy, and he was very excited about our visit. He explained to us the story several times on our 10 minute drive how when the baby came, Jane exclaimed to him that her name had to be Alita, so that they could always remember me here in Africa, even after I go home to America. Shortly after we arrived, Baby Alita was brought out and handed to me. She is beautiful! She has very soft, curly hair, and perfect little facial features. We enjoyed ourselves that afternoon, as we met the local chief (a woman!), the traditional mid-wife who delivered Alita, the rest of David & Jane's 6 children, and other friends who came to help prepare a meal for us. We had cokes, chicken, potatoes, rice, & chapati. David, Jane, the midwife & the cheif gave mini-speeches, and Carrie and I also shared our gratitude for being with them. I presented gifts of a baby blanket & baby hat. It was like an African baby shower! It was so much fun, but a very humbling experience as well. I never would have guessed some one might name their child after me! It was truely a humbling, yet encouraging experience. [smile]

Love & Blessings,
Alita

Quotable

“You are not called upon to commit yourself to a need, or to a task, or to a field. You are called upon to commit yourself to God! It is He then who takes care of the consequences and commits you where He wants you. He is the Lord of the harvest! He is the head of the body– and He is gloriously competent to assume His own responsibilities!
Man is not indispensable to God. God is indispensable to man!”
[Ian Thomas, 1961]

I found this quote a while ago in a prayer calendar that sits on mine & Carrie’s desk. It’s now on my computer desktop. I love it. It’s such a great reminder to me everyday that God is the one in control here. That the only thing I really need to focus on is Him and committing my life to Him. I get too wrapped up in the details sometimes to remember this very simple, basic part of our Christian faith. What about you? [smile]

Feelin' better...

Thank you for your awesome prayers! I am feeling much better!!! [BIG smile] Whatever doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right?! After being wiped out for so long, I had almost forgotten what strong felt like! But God is Good, every day, all the time!

I also wanted to let you know that I am preparing for and getting excited about my visit home this summer! I will be in Oregon August 1st-12th, and then in Seattle August 12-20th. I will be at Powell Butte Church on August 6th and Northwest Church on August 13th. Family & friends in Salem, OR please keep your calendar open the first week in August. I plan on coming down to see everyone around the 3rd & 4th. Family & friends in Central Oregon, I plan on having an open house at my parents' sometime between the 7th & 11th. I will let you know the exact date as soon as it is nailed down. And friends in Seattle, I will be available the week of the 13-19th, aside from my bride'smaid's duties to Jenn. I would love to see as many of you as possible!!

Much love & Blessings,
Alita

The Malaria Blues

If I were to post some pictures of what I've been doing over the last 2 weeks or so, they would be pretty boring because I've basically been in bed, either sleeping or reading! Last week I wasn't feeling very well. I was really tired and kinda achey all over. I didn't have a fever, so I didn't worry about it too much, but by Monday my head was throbbing constantly and my stomach hurt pretty bad, so Greg took me to the doctor. Kelly had just been diagnosed with malaria (again!), as well as one of our workers, Emmanuel. After a short wait, I found out malaria was my fate as well. A day later Carrie went in because she was feeling the same way I was, and she was diagnosed again as well. I started the treatment prescribed, but by Wednesday afternoon I felt worse than I did on Monday! Greg has discovered this brand new malaria treatment on the market made out of a plant that grows in China, so he picked some up for me and it seems to be working better... on Wednesday, after Greg fell asleep for 3 hours in the middle of the morning, Kelly took him to the doctor and he was diagnosed with malaria as well. In the course of one week, we all dropped like flies... or mosquitoes in this case I guess! Carrie, Kelly & Greg have all pretty much recovered, but for some reason mine seems to be holding on longer. I feel a little bit better today... probably the best I've felt in a week. But I thought I was feeling better on Thursday, too. I woke up Friday morning and it was all back in full force. Malaria is a very strong, complicated sickness that is hard to kill off.

You may be wondering to yourself how we got sick, because you thought we were taking anti-malaria treatments. Well, after we got here, we were told that it wasn't a good idea to stay on an anti-malarial treatment for two years, because of the long term effects on the body. Anti-malaria treatments are not 100% full proof either, so we decided to test our luck and take our chances.

I know a lot of people at home have been praying for healing for me, and I appreciate that so much! Please keep the prayers coming, as I don't feel like I'm outa the woods, yet! :)

Blessings,
Alita

Praise!

Yesterday we met Janet & Fielden for lunch and made arrangements for us to purchase the Land Cruiser! They are so happy for us to have it; and we are so happy to be blessed with a better vehicle.

We are defintely still stepping out in faith here, though. Our church gave us the go ahead to purchase the vehicle, but we are still seeking out funds to pay it with. (They can offer some, but probably not ALL the funds.)It is a huge blessing that Fielden is willing to literally take whatever payments we can offer until it's paid off, but we also want to be responsible and get it paid off as soon as possible. So PLEASE continue to pray for the Land Cruiser and its funding.

Mt. Elgon

Yesterday morning, Greg and I headed out our gate on foot with backpacks, caught boda-boda's (bicycle taxis) to the matatu (vehicle taxis) park, loaded up and headed towards Mt. Elgon to visit with Janet & Fielden Allison for the night. Janet & Fielden have lived on Mt. Elgon for 16 years. They've been in Africa around 34 years, and married for 36 years (give or take a few years, I can't remember exactly!) CRF supports 36 students on Mt. Elgon at Kapkirwok High School, so we were going to check on up on the kids, as well as visit a little bit with the Allisons about their work on the mountain. In two weeks they will be trading their custom built home on the mountain side for the coast of Dar Es Salam (spelling?!), Tanzania.

"First Class" in the matatu.
After 3 interesting rides in 3 different matatus, 5 hours later Greg & I arrived at Janet & Fielden's place. We ate some lunch and walked up to the high school to start visiting with the kids. It poured rain while we were at the school, leaving a nice thick mud to walk home in. (My flip flops gained about an inch in the sole on the 5 minute walk!)

CRF Student Mercy Chemtai and me.
We had a great visit with the Allisons, who are extremely hospitable and relaxing to be around. (I unfortunately, forgot to get a picture of them!) They also offered to sell us their 1991 Toyota Land Cruiser. They are buying a new vehicle when they move to Tanzania, and really need to sell this vehicle. We have been praying for a good car and a good deal, and they have been praying for a buyer. They are the only owners of the car, which is amazing for Africa, and they only want $10,000 for it, which is also amazing! I'm including a picture of the car; please be praying about this opportunity for us. We need to do all the fundraising for a new vehicle on our own, which will be a challenge, but God is faithful! Fielden is willing to take payments of whatever we can offer, for however long we need to take; which is a huge blessing!

A real bush car... [Grunt! Grunt!]
Our trip was great; both Greg and I wished we could have stayed longer. The mountain side is so beautiful and peaceful. Please pray for Carrie & Kelly as they are in Nairobi until Monday, working on their work permits and picking up a sofa set for our house. Please pray for safe travels!

Blessings,
Alita

Children's Home Experience III

Looking Back…

I have been lost, recovering from my stint at the Children’s Home. I have also been trying to recover from the culture shock I found myself in about a week after I had moved out! Having the opportunity to actually live within the culture was an amazing experience that I do not regret, but the reality of what I learned about the culture also left me in a state of shock. I think I know now what the phrase “culture shock” actually means… but I want to focus on the fun, positive part of my stay there as well.

So, here’s a look back, with pictures of what happened while I was living at the Home.


First, we had a celebration for two of our boys who left the Home to move on to the next part of their lives. We had a big party, mostly planned by the kids, which involved singing, performing, advice giving, a blessing by the parents, and a message from Greg. Carrie baked a big batch of chocolate chip cookies, which the kids devoured, loving every moment! In this picture, the parents are blessing the boys by washing their feet. This is a traditional way for Kenyan parents to bless their children.


As you may know, we spent most of March remodeling the kitchen at the Home. I was there on the much anticipated evening of finally opening the kitchen. All of the children gathered in the new dining room, were served, prayed, and ate together. We even had an official ribbon cutting! The staff and children thoroughly enjoy their new cooking and dining area.


Easter at the Kenya Church of Christ Children’s Home had a whole new twist this year. Carrie & I decided to share a little of the American Easter spirit with the kids, so we bought a bunch of eggs, vinegar & food coloring and showed the kids how to color eggs. We weren’t sure what they would think of this crazy mzungus idea, but they caught on very soon and seemed to have a blast! They even figured out how to mix the colors to make different colors without any hints from us. After they went to church, we hid the eggs in a small parameter around the kitchen. When church finished, they all headed down to the kitchen to hunt for the eggs. We should have hid them better, because I think they were all found within 5 minutes!


One day, when I came back to the Home from being at our house, the truck was fairly muddy from driving on the dirt roads after the rain. They children LOVE to wash the truck, so they asked me to drive it over near a trough of water so they could clean it up. Almost all of the younger children (over 15 kids) grabbed soap, rags & buckets and went crazy, inside & outside. So I grabbed my camera and went crazy as well!


Until Next Time,
Alita

Children's Home Experience II

The Sacrifice of Motherhood…

Hey there! Well, it’s been almost three weeks since I’ve moved in… wow! It has flown by so quickly, too! Our parent search is still… searching, but we are making a bit of head way. We interviewed a new couple this week who were outstanding. The only “problem” is that they are not from a Church of Christ, which may cause trouble for us with some church members initially. Please continue to pray for this situation!
In the mean time, I have been learning more and more the sacrifice of being a mom…

Being a mom means sacrificing the ability to go to the bathroom whenever you want.
Being a mom means holding sick children in the middle of the night until they fall asleep.
Being a mom means saying no, even when your heart wishes to say yes.
Being a mom means saying yes, even if it is taking a risk.
Being a mom means getting up earlier and going to bed later.
Being a mom means giving less time to your physical appearance.

I have also been learning more about what it takes to be a parent and discovering what I had in me that I didn’t realize, as well as the weaknesses I have when it comes to parenting. I guess this is a good pre-requisite to my future life as a parent (God willing). The questions, “Where are you going? Why are you going? For how long are you planning on being gone?” fly out of my mouth without second thought.

Then, of course, there is the heartache of motherhood. This situation is unique; as I am the fifth “mother” these girls have had in the time they have lived at the Children’s Home. One of the teenage girls, Agnes, has really opened up to me about the history of the home. I have learned that some parents in the past have been extremely abusive, both physically as well as emotionally. As I hear her share, my heart breaks and burns with anger at the same time. Obviously, these parents have been removed and dealt with, but the scars (both physical & emotional) they have left behind will take years to heal. Carrie & I are already talking about some potential “anonymous” counselors we know of here in town who we can have come and be available to these children. We can only do so much as the administrators, the CRF people, and the wazungu (white people).

May I take a moment to explain some of the frustrations in running a Children’s Home in the third world? Thanks.  First of all, an orphanage is not a concept that jives with the Kenyan (or even African) cultural concepts of family. Orphans and widows are to be taken in by the extended family so that they stay within the same community; the same tribe and therefore do not cause conflict. A children’s home on the other hand, mixes people of all different tribes & backgrounds. The tribes here have innate personality differences, which can cause some problems in the raising of children. Another problem is that this culture does not foster trust in relationships. Rather, the general consensus is to trust no one. An orphanage requires a great amount of trust between all parties involved. In this situation, that includes children, parents, administrators/missionaries, CRF, and the supporters. Creating an environment that practices trust in relationships is quite difficult. Trust is crucial, not only in financial matters, but in creating a secure environment for the children to grow up in. But there again, creating a secure environment for children is a Western mentality. In the third world, there is no such thing as a secure environment. The unfortunate thing is that in a world that is full of rapidly dying people, places like Children’s homes are an inevitable solution to the problem. The economy is too weak to allow extended family members to continue taking in orphans and widows. Our home was the first orphanage in Kitale, 14 years ago. Since then, at least 10 more homes have been opened in this small area alone. All of them, like ours, house at least 40 children. It is sad to think about and deal with. It involves the sacrifice, not only of motherhood, but of several others to make it work. And in the end, because of children like Agnes, I believe it is truly worth it.

Love,
Alita

Children's Home Experience I

The Heart of God
Well, the adventure has begun! Tonight is my second night at the Children’s Home. It’s Saturday. Most of the kids didn’t go to school today. School on Saturday is a normal thing in the Kenya school system, however it’s the end of a term, so things are winding down for them right now but they are wound up tighter than corkscrews! As I sit in the “silence” of my room, giggling, running, singing, screaming & shuffling flourish outside my door. Kids are kids; no matter what color their skin, or what country they live in! So far I think this job is not going to be that bad. It’s going to take a few days to feel like this is “home” instead of just work, like it has been for the last five months.
Elizabeth, one of our house staff and Agnus, one of the older girls, helped me clean my little “apartment” today, which was a much needed blessing. We threw away a bunch of junk that has been collecting in the small space since the first parents moved in, in 1992. (I think I am the fifth “parent” to live here since then!) They scrubbed & mopped for me as well, while I organized my things and the things I am in charge of as a parent. Greg came & picked me up around 2, so I could go home and take a shower, as there is no hot water available here. There is a hot water tank & a shower in my room, but the water heater is not functioning at the moment. We’ve put that on Kelly’s honey-do list for the home. (smile)
Now, on to what I was originally intending to write about… the children! They are so amusing to me—so precious, jovial, expressive, & beautiful. When I came back from my shower today I brought my laptop, so Agnus, Elizabeth & I proceeded to listen to my music and dance in my room. We got down with TobyMac, Paul Colman & Holding Out. Some of the younger girls joined us and I taught them the motions to Paul Colman’s song, “Run”. They caught on right away, as they LOVE to dance & sing. The Children’s Home choir is actually pretty talented… I’ve had dreams of taking them on the road, but that will have to wait for the moment. I think “Run” will be their next hit.
Living here is giving me a chance to see the true personalities of these children come out, and it is very interesting, especially to an analytical like myself. Agnus, for instance, I have noticed has a little problem with being bossy. I have already had to stick up for my choices about how to arrange my room, and ask her to not tell me what to do in the last twenty-four hours. If she is bossing me around, I can't imagine how she must treat the other girls, especially the younger ones. With the language barrier though, I can’t correct her behavior towards them directly because I never know what she is saying to them!
Three year old Amani is the youngest little tike at the home. He is absolutely adorable; all of the children love him, as well as the adults. He is sleeping in my room (on his own bed) and at about quarter to twelve last night I heard a thud and a short cry. In the 3 seconds it took me to get over to where he had landed on the floor, he was already asleep. Not much fazes this kid! Tonight he was holding a warm cup of chai, (Swahili for tea, so when you order a “chai tea latte” at Starbucks, you’re really ordering a tea tea… hehe!) standing near the front door and another child barreled around the corner and knocked his tea all over him. He cried for a minute, until he realized that he was ok, and then sat down and drank the rest of his tea in about 30 seconds. For a toddler, he sure LOVES his chai…but don’t worry he sleeps long & hard!
Then there’s Brenda. Brenda was brought to the Home by the police after her mother beat & severely burned her because she innocently asked her father one day why her other daddies brought her gifts and he didn’t. (Her mother, it turns out was selling herself to other men in the village behind her father’s back.) Brenda has a beautiful smile and an equally beautiful heart. She speaks English very well for her age (she’s about 9 or 10). She loves to sing and dance and make funny faces all the time. She is one of the girls who will just come up and stand close, which is more temptation than I can handle to wrap my arms around her & kiss the top of her head!
Before God called me to Kenya, I never in a million years would have guessed that I would work with an orphanage one day. Even after I got here, I would have never suspected that I would move in to the Home and live there for a while. What’s even more, I had never expected to feel such a passion for orphans, and supporting them in a better life like I have discovered here. In America, we are not forced to face orphans and widows like we are here in Africa. Being here has truly helped me discover the meaning of “pure & undefiled religion” (James 1:27). I am growing to understanding this verse better than ever before. As I grow closer to these children, I find myself closer to the heart of God.